I personally hate lying. I believe lying is for cowards who can’t handle the consequences of telling the truth. I have always believed, and still do to this day, that you should treat others the way you want to be treated. However, over the years, I have reconciled to make one exception about always telling the truth and this decision has benefited not only myself, but also the young women in my life as well.
DATING 18 – 24 YEAR OLD WOMEN
I’ve always looked young for my age. This feature was a pain in the ass back in the day because I didn’t look “manly” and I looked considerably younger than the girls my age. Therefore, my youthful appearance was seen as a drawback throughout high school and early adulthood, but as the years passed by, it became a major advantage. Throughout my late 20’s and into my 30’s, girls still believed I was around 24 years old. This gave me a ton of experience with getting laid and maintaining relationships with the types of girls that I like the most – typically the 18 – 24 year olds.
There are a ton of advantages from dating girls in this age range. First, these girls are in the physical prime of their lives. Rarely will a girl look any better than when she is in this age range.
Not only are there obvious physical advantages, but there are psychological advantages as well. The older a girl gets, the more relationship baggage she accumulates. Meaning, the more sexual relationships a girl has, the more jaded she becomes to new relationships. When girls are still fairly new to relationships, their “love” for their man is a lot more intense and passionate because the feelings are so fresh and new. Once a girl has been through a few failed relationships, falling in “love” loses a lot of it’s punch. You are not considered “The One”, you’re just another brick in the wall at that point. This isn’t really a problem if you are just looking for casual relationships, but if you are after something long term, you can see how having a girl with less sexual baggage would be an advantage.
I’ll sum it up quickly by saying that their youth usually makes them more dynamic, more feminine, more adventurous, and more emotional – all qualities that I like in a girl. However, girls in this age range are more protective of their social status than any other age which brings about its own particular challenges.
PROTECT HER REPUTATION
From the time a girl enters high school until about the age of 24, a girl’s reputation within in her social group is more important than anything to her. In some cases, a girl’s social reputation is more important to her than life itself. I remember a girl in my high school committing suicide because she was kicked out of her social circle and these types of scenarios are not uncommon. Acceptance among her peers means she can’t deviate from the status quo or else she risks being ostracized and losing her status.
Unlike in the Eastern world where older guy and younger girl relationships are socially acceptable, in the West, these relationships are frowned upon. In the West, the guys are considered “creeps” that are taking advantage of naive girls, and the girls are considered “gold-diggers” or just too dumb or inexperienced to know any better. Therefore, if a girl has a boyfriend that is considered older than “normal”, she risks losing status among her social group and must promptly weed him out. OH NO!
For many years, whenever a girl considerably younger than me asked for my age, I told the truth straight up. This usually happened during the first meeting. Sometimes I would get laid and never see them again. Sometimes, if she really liked me, she would stick around as a long term girlfriend and just lie to her friends and family about my age and sometimes they would say, “I wish that you just would have lied to me,” and then I’d never see them again. The second time I heard a girl say, “Why didn’t you just lie to me?” It finally dawned on me. I wasn’t doing them any favors by telling them the truth. They didn’t give a shit about my actual age. They cared about what their social circle would think about my age and the social repercussions that it would cause.
If I lied about my age, then it meant that SHE didn’t have to lie to friends and family. I would be responsible for the lie and she would be absolved from the judgment of her social circle.
Women don’t give a shit about your number (age) or your words. Those things are intangible and can be easily faked. Women look for PROOF of your value that cannot be easily faked:
Do you look strong, fit and healthy? Primarily, can you produce healthy offspring?
Do you have money or the potential to make money? Primarily, can you provide for her and said offspring?
At its most primitive level, that is what they are looking for in a long term relationship.
By the time a girl reaches 25, she will usually be less susceptible to social pressures from her peers and more accepting of dating men that are considered older than “normal”. This is usually because she is less dependent on the tightly knit social circles of high school and university, and some of her friends will often have some experience with much older guys which makes the practice of dating these guys more socially acceptable. Even still, if you are considerably older than her, I’d lie about it anyway.
“SO HOW OLD ARE YOU ANYWAY?”
This is loaded question, similar to “What kind of work do you do?” that older girls use. It’s a boyfriend screening question. If your answer is considered too old for her, she’ll screen you out of long term relationship contention. So then how do you answer this question? Here’s how I do it:
“How old do you think I am?”
She will reply with an age that is older, but still considered “normal” to her.
“Good guess 🙂 “
At that point, you just change the subject without dwelling on the age difference.
In addition, if you are younger guy that looks more mature and wants to have long term relationships with older women, then I would advise you to lie about your age as well. Again, they don’t care about your actual age, they just care about what their social group will think about her dating a younger guy. “Did you hear about Jessica dating a 20 year old? I know right, she’s such a cougar.” This loss of social status is what they are trying to avoid, so just lie about your age to save her the trouble.
WHAT ARE THE CONSEQUENCES OF LYING ABOUT YOUR AGE?
I know that there is going to some boyscouts out there complaining about having to lie to women:
“But lying about your age undermines all the trust you built in the relationship. How can she ever trust you again?!”
I completely understand where you are coming from. I used to feel the same way until I looked at things logically. What harm do you cause by lying to a girl about your age? The answer is NONE. You actually save her the trouble of having to lie to her social group by doing it yourself.
“But how would you feel if a woman lied about her age to you?!”
A woman lying about her age poses considerably more problems than a man doing the same because the time frame for a woman to produce healthy offspring is so much shorter. If a woman is 35 years old and tells a man that she is 25 years old, then the man is left thinking that he has 5+ years of relationship time before he needs to decide to have children with her. The consequences of this lie are far more significant because the man does in fact NOT have 5+ years to decide if he wants children with her. If he wants children with that woman he needs to decide NOW. This lie is a huge punch in the face for the guy, but it doesn’t have the same impact for a woman.
Let’s say a guy is 35 years old and tells a 20 year old woman that he is 25. Sperm donor clinics accept semen samples from guys up to 45 years old. That should tell you how much more fertile men are compared to women as they get older. Okay, so let’s say this 35 year old guy and 20 year old girl really hit it off. Both the guy and the girl have 10 years to decide if they want to have children. Both parties have tons of time to decide their future, so nobody gets hurt from this lie. Let’s fast forward 10 years and they are still together. Nobody would bat an eyelash about a 30 year old woman with a 45 year old guy. Nobody cares at that age, but watch people flip their shit about a 20 year woman with a 35 year old guy. It’s double standard that is complete bullshit.
“But what happens when she finds out your REAL age?!”
Honestly, I have had this happen to me plenty of times and, like I said before, they don’t really care about your age, they just care about what their friends and family will think. What you’ll usually get is the girl saying something like: “What? I thought you were 27?”
Just smile and say your real age and move along like nothing happened. I have never had a girl bring it up or feel “hurt” because of it. They mostly just smile and look at you like, “You sneaky bastard” and then all is forgotten. She forgets about it because once you have been seeing each other for at least a month or two and a relationship is formed, your age is no longer a factor.