On pretty much every “Game” website, you’ll find many brainwashed zealots complaining that they have approached hundreds of girls and tried all the “guru’s” material but they still can’t get laid. The feedback he receives from other brainwashed zealots is to:
“Work on his body language”
“Work on his voice tone”
“Try a different opener” or other such nonsense.
Instead of using some basic common sense and addressing the giant elephant in the room, they ignore the most important factor, your appearance, and focus on a million other factors that have little to no effect on your results. It’s like a Major League hitter worrying about his batting gloves instead of addressing his batting mechanics. The batting gloves account for MAYBE 1% of his ability to hit a fast ball thrown by a Major League pitcher, so why even address it? I hate to be the bringer of bad news, but if you have put in lots of approaches and don’t get any dates, it’s a looks issue. Get your looks sorted out, or prepare for more failure.
This does NOT mean you have to look like a male model to get laid or get a hot girlfriend. You don’t have to be best looking guy the girl has ever dated, but you have to be good looking ENOUGH for the girl to want to fuck you. That may require you to upgrade your style, haircut, facial hair, and physique, but all of this is within your control. Girls go to amazing lengths to make themselves look as good as possible, and if you want an attractive girl, you are going to have to do the same.
Looks matter to the opposite sex, just like they matter to us. Sure, there are lots of “gurus” out there trying to sell bullshit like “Looks don’t matter, all you need is my super elite product to get the sex life of you dreams”, but anyone with eyes to see and some gray matter upstairs knows the score.
Both men and women are incredibly looks driven. They only difference is that we are attracted to different physical attributes. Men are attracted to feminine features like hourglass figures, big boobs, narrow waists, big butts, and shiny hair. While women are attracted to masculine features like height and musculature. But the big question is, “HOW important are your looks? Do you need to improve your looks and if so, how do you go about doing that?” I’ll cover all those questions.
HOW IMPORTANT ARE LOOKS?
Everyone makes snap decisions about you at the first sight of you. The girl knows within a few seconds if you’re attractive enough to fuck. The whole notion of “Looks don’t matter to girls”, started because guys never understood how a girl’s sexual availability works. A PUA dork will see a good looking guy get “rejected” and say:
“See, I told you looks don’t matter! He looks like a Greek god and he STILL got rejected!”
It never occurred to them that the girl isn’t looking for a man at that point in time. Imagine that. You could be the best looking guy in the world, but if you’re hitting on random girls throughout the day, you’re still going to get “rejected” the majority of the time simply because most attractive girls aren’t looking for a new cock in their lives, no matter how hot he is. Most girls already have their man situation figured out, so they are not in the market for a new one. It’s just like if I tried to sell you the world’s most pimping fridge when you already have a decent working one at home. You’ll pass, no matter how awesome my fridge is or how well I talk about it because you simply don’t need it.
Okay, but what about the girls that ARE looking for a man in their life? Now this is where your looks become important. The better your looks, the higher the odds are that sexually available girls will be interested in you. Your looks are the most important factor for girls that are DTF and looking to get laid. While your looks are important for girls looking for relationships, your money and social status start to play a bigger part in their long term decision. See my article on Retention for more details on what factors affect your ability to retain girls in relationships.
“DO I NEED TO IMPROVE MY LOOKS?”
You should work hard to make the absolute best of what you have. You want to make yourself as attractive as possible, just like I’m sure you’re after the girls that make themselves as attractive as possible. That means a current and stylish fashion sense, athletic built body, current haircut and facial hair. The haircut and fashion can be sorted out in a weekend, so there are no excuses on that front. Your physique will take some time, but will give you the biggest returns on investment. I can get your physique handled with online training and fashion sorted out over Skype.
“BUT I KNOW A VERY GOOD LOOKING GUY AND HE NEVER GETS LAID!”
The number one reason good looking guys don’t get laid is that they don’t talk to girls! You can look like an absolute Adonis, but if you stay at home all day on your computer and don’t talk to any girls, you won’t be getting laid. Good looking guys are usually the guys that struggle the most with Approach Anxiety. This is because their ego is usually heavily tied to their appearance. They are made to believe that because they look good, there is little chance of rejection, however, if and when they do get “rejected”, they take it as a direct blow to their ego and self worth, making approaching that much more difficult. Less attractive guys usually don’t have as much trouble with Approach Anxiety because they are not expected to be good with girls, so they don’t put as much pressure on themselves to avoid rejection. If you look good AND talk to girls, good things will happen – both components are essential.
“HOW DO I KNOW IF MY LOOKS ARE THE PROBLEM?”
There is a chance that you might already have your physique and style sorted out and if that’s the case, go hit on 30 attractive girls and see what happens. If you manage to get some dates set up, congratulations, you are attractive enough for the cold approach business. Keep grinding and you will be rewarded. If on the other hand, you go 0 for 30, you probably have a looks problem. In which case, approaching more women will just waste your time until you’ve improved your looks.
“BUT I KNOW THIS UGLY, SHORT, FAT, BALD GUY THAT GETS LAID LIKE TILE!”
Some variation of this statement pops up from time to time on message boards on the internet, yet I have NEVER seen or met such a character in my entire life. I have met many average or ugly looking guys that were very good at ENTERTAINING women, but when it actually came to putting the D in the V, they came up empty. There is a big difference between guys that can make a girl laugh or get a phone number and the guys that actually get laid. When you are inexperienced, making a girl laugh,getting a make out at the bar or getting her phone number can seem like a BIG deal. After all, a girl wouldn’t do those things unless she really liked you, right? Sex must be in the bag then, right? Uh, not exactly. See my article, “Stop Trying To Entertain Women And Get Laid Instead” for more details.
It doesn’t matter how good looking, rich or powerful you become, when you approach random strangers, you will always be playing a numbers game. Getting comfortable with rejection is just part of having an abundant sex life and part of being successful in business. However, by improving your appearance, you increase your odds of success to a greater degree than any “line” or “technique” ever will. Forget the idea of bullshit “lines” or “techniques”as the answer to your sex life woes, improve your appearance and talk to lots of girls instead. What you will gain from this process will not only improve your sex life, but your entire life in general.